Quite literally. At 24 weeks my little baby is kicking up a storm in my belly. And this is a big deal. For the first time in my pregnancy I feel confident and positive. Unlike the first few months when I would go into a minor panic attack each time there would be a hormonal change. From more face grease to less face grease to bigger boobs to less sensitive boobs and on and on. I was constantly worried that a change indicated a problem. Although "they" tell you that many women have miscarriages (especially their first pregnancy) "they" don't really tell you about the post traumatic effects it might have on you during your next pregnancy. I am not one for sparing details.
If you are one of the unfortunate mamas to experience a miscarriage you should know that any of your insanely paranoid, schizophrenic feelings are not unjustified. After talking to others like me, I realized how ridiculously normal it is to worry about every single little thing. I also realized how completely unproductive those crazy feelings are. Sure, it isn't easy to get a handle on them once the nerves and anxiety surface. But there are lots of ways to manage those feelings. Here are a few I have relied on throughout this pregnancy...
Acupuncture
I went every 2 weeks until the end of my first trimester and now go once every week. Not only is it relaxing, but it gives me some serious peace of mind. My acupuncturist told me that none of her patients have ever had a miscarriage unless it was a chromosomal abnormality. Her walls are full of pictures, postcards, and thank you notes from moms whose babies she helped bring into this world. I constantly remind myself that I have her in my corner.
Meditation
I've never really mastered the whole emptying my mind/meditating thing. But with a little help from some guided meditations (my personal favorite is "Visualizing Pregnancy") I have been able to steer myself away from the dark abyss of worry.
Yoga
Each and every yoga class I have ever attended has left me with a fresh outlook. I love yoga and although it has gotten more difficult as my pregnancy has progressed, I am planning on taking some prenatal classes this fall.
Positive Thinking
You know the saying "Positive attracts positive"? Well, it's true. As hard as it is to switch your brain from gloom and doom to hope and inspiration - you have to find a way to do it. Try listening to a song that makes you want to dance your ass off. Or go with one of my old standbys and watch a John Hughes movie where everything works out in the end. Just be sure to surround yourself with something that reminds you that life is good.
Create a Mantra
One of my friends told me that she likes to repeat the words, "Everything always works out for me" when she is feeling lost. I wrote those words on a sticky note and stuck it on my computer. Now, every day I am greeted with a mantra that helps me tackle the unknown with confidence.
Remember that you're going to have ups and downs if you've had a miscarriage. Heck, you might have them in general when you're pregnant thanks to our whacky hormone fluctuations and the fact that it's natural to worry about the unknown. But also remember that thinking positive is pretty darn powerful. And amidst all of the things you can't control, you can control a positive outlook.
